Death of the Gerund

I am writing today to discuss with great sadness the imminent extinction of our dear friend, the Gerund.  An event which while perhaps not signifying the end of the world as we know it, certainly sounds the death knell of refined civilization, and the rise of the great unwashed. Continue reading

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Charity Begins at Home

We have recently become enamored of a new charity, designed to better the lot of our local communities on Long Island.

Here’s the very sad story.  Since the pesky economic crisis hit, many a Long Islander is finding it harder and harder to keep gas in their Hummer, Suburban, Expedition and of course Cadillac Escalade.  These poor SUVs are now languishing in the driveways of the modest McMansions that lard the leafy suburbs of Nassau and Suffolk Counties, leading to anguished cries echoing up through the double height atria of their owners’ humble abodes. Continue reading